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Relationships: Can A Relationship Bring Up Someone's Attachment Trauma?
Tue, 26 Feb 2019 12:34:07 -0600
When someone gets into a relationship, they may believe that they have finally met their match. What they have been through in the past, when it comes to this area of their life, is then going to be well and truly over.
How Do I Know If I Should Help You or Not?
Mon, 10 Sep 2018 12:34:03 -0500
I have a real problem. If I listen to others, I really don't know whether I should help you or not. Actually, I do know, but it occasionally gets me into trouble, because at times I have offered to help those that some I know don't want me to help. For all manner of reason, good reasons and not-so-good reasons, helping sometimes creates problems in my relationships.
How to Get Someone Sober
Thu, 25 Oct 2018 11:07:33 -0500
If someone you care about drinks too much or abuses drugs, you know how hard you've tried to get him sober. You probably already know that what you've done hasn't worked. Try these suggestions to increase the odds that the person you care about will get sober.
Relationships: Is The Purpose Of A Relationship To Trigger Old Wounds?
Thu, 28 Feb 2019 13:45:17 -0600
When someone has just started to date another person, they can find that they feel really good. They are then still going to be on the same planet that they were on before they met this person, but it can be as if they have been taken somewhere else.
Heeding the Walking-Away Moment
Fri, 17 Aug 2018 09:53:24 -0500
There are at least two opportunities to walk away with wisdom: To walk away from something permanently that has lasted for too long, and, to walk away from something temporarily where space is required. Knowing how and when to make these two decisions requires wisdom.
Relationships: Why Are Some Men Only Interested In Women Who Need To Be Saved?
Fri, 17 Aug 2018 10:41:38 -0500
When a man and a woman are together, and they are both in touch with their power, there will be no need for one of them to try to rescue the other. They will both have boundaries and they won't be carrying too much baggage.
Relationships: How Can Someone Know If They Are Ready For A Relationship?
Fri, 09 Nov 2018 13:04:41 -0600
In the same way that there are a number of reasons as to why someone would want to eat something, there are also a number of reasons as to why someone would want to have a relationship. If someone wants to eat something, it could simply show that they are hungry.
Emotional Support: Does Someone Want To Have Their Problems Solved If They Are Emotional?
Wed, 16 Jan 2019 14:24:14 -0600
If someone's emotions are not settled and they are all at sea, so to speak, there is the chance that they are going through a challenging time. Or, it could show that something in their life has had a big impact on them.
Social Media: Has Social Media Caused Some People To Trade Intimacy For Attention?
Wed, 26 Sep 2018 12:53:31 -0500
When someone shares something online, they can end up receiving a fair amount of attention, and this can allow them to feel good about themselves. Even so, what happens online might only be a small part of their life.
Relationships: Can Someone's Adult Relationships Reflect What Took Place During Their Early Years?
Thu, 07 Feb 2019 08:45:39 -0600
If someone has the inclination to end up in relationships that are not very fulfilling or are even abusive, it can be normal for them to experience pain. Also, as a result of what keeps taking place, they can come to see themselves as unlucky.
Relationships: Why Do Some People Act As Though They Are An Extension Of Others?
Fri, 09 Nov 2018 08:52:39 -0600
A lot of attention has been given to the type of person who sees others as an extension of themselves. In this case, someone won't believe that other people have their own thoughts, feelings, and interests, and are, therefore, individuals.
Relationships: Can Someone Have Relationship Problems If They Lack Self-Awareness?
Mon, 28 Jan 2019 10:21:13 -0600
In the same way that someone would need to be in the right place in order to drive a car, they would also need to be in the right place to have a relationship. When it comes to the former, if someone was unable to drive or was drunk, it wouldn't be a good idea for them to drive.
The Prodigal Son and His Brother
Sat, 21 Jul 2018 10:32:42 -0500
The Prodigal Son is a parable told by Jesus about the younger son who demanded his inheritance from father and then once he got it went to a faraway land where he squandered his inheritance. This article about his older brother who continued to work for his father during the time his little brother was away.
The Relational Beauty of Empathy
Mon, 20 Aug 2018 08:37:28 -0500
It has long been a mystery to me just why on earth some people have an excess of empathy and some people have a dearth of it. At one end of the spectrum we have people so empathic they end up in relationships with those at the other end of the spectrum - those at the narcissistic end. I don't think it's useful in the present discussion to focus on the latter, because the former are so much more worthy of discussion and praise.
Relationships: Can Someone's Inner Critic Cause Them To Put Up With Abusive Behaviour?
Mon, 22 Oct 2018 08:48:47 -0500
If one is used to spending time around people who are abusive, they can come to the conclusion that they are a victim. It is then not that one is playing a part in what is taking place; it is that this is just how their life is.
Relationships: Can Smartphones Destroy Relationships?
Thu, 19 Jul 2018 10:48:15 -0500
In the same way that it is easy for someone not embrace each day of the week due to being completely absorbed in what will happen at the weekend, it is also just as easy for them to ignore the people in their life due to being completely absorbed in their Smartphone. In each of these cases, the present moment won't be fully embraced.
Relationships: Do Some Women's Childhoods Set Them Up To Be Attracted To Abusive Men?
Fri, 01 Feb 2019 13:30:21 -0600
One thing a woman may find, when it comes to her relationships, is that she has the tendency to be drawn to men who are not very pleasant. As a result of this, she could struggle to understand what is going on.
Could Stress Be Distressing Your Relationships?
Sat, 28 Jul 2018 18:45:17 -0500
So many people I encounter are under the direct burden of stress. Levels of general anxiety in the population today are as high as at any other time in the history of the world. And yet, as you read this you might be like much of the world, living in comparative luxury compared to others who cannot read this, and there are those historically who have faced much harder realities than we do today, yet possibly experienced less general anxiety. These below are just four items on what would be a long list.
Tips to Find a Good Escort Agency
Tue, 26 Feb 2019 12:56:01 -0600
There are numerous escort agencies out there, which makes it overwhelming to opt for one, especially if you are just starting out. Actually, an escort is a professional that you can hire to be your personal assistant on tour or trip. We suggest that you be careful when choosing an escort. Some of them work independently while others work for an agency. So, it's better to choose an agency instead. Given below are a few tips that can help you choose the best agency. Read on.
Relationships: Do Some People Shut Down Emotionally After A Breakup?
Wed, 26 Dec 2018 13:26:45 -0600
There are a number of things that can cause someone to experience incredible pain, and a breakup is one of those things. When someone experiences a break up, it can feel as though their whole has come to end.
Relationships: Can Someone Have Affairs When They Have A Fear Of Abandonment?
Tue, 18 Dec 2018 11:56:48 -0600
If someone is in a relationship that they no longer want to be in, it might not be long until it comes to an end. Perhaps they have been together for a number of months, or they may have been with each other for a number of years.
Masculinity: Do Some Women's Childhoods Set Them Up To Become Overly Masculine?
Mon, 18 Feb 2019 08:18:09 -0600
In recent years, it has been said that men have become more feminine and women have become more masculine. Naturally, this is a generalisation and doesn't apply to every man/woman in the western world.
Dating: Is It A Bad Idea To Have Sex On The First Date?
Thu, 21 Mar 2019 09:54:06 -0500
Many, many years ago, sex was something that people would typically have if they wanted children. Nowadays, it is something that lot of people have if they want to experience pleasure.
Relationships: Is It A Good Sign If Someone Is Extremely Attracted To Another Person?
Mon, 21 Jan 2019 11:18:07 -0600
While one could come across another person and not really experience anything, they could come across someone else and it could be as if their whole being has been hijacked. But, even though this is the case, it doesn't mean that one will see this as a bad thing.
The Thing About Trust
Mon, 15 Oct 2018 09:11:32 -0500
Trust is a dangerous thing. You give it when you determine it is deserved. We lavish it on those we esteem, those we have given leadership of our lives to.
Relationships: Why Do Some People Try To Take Other People's Pain Away?
Fri, 17 Aug 2018 11:13:47 -0500
Pain is something that everyone on the planet experiences and, therefore, it is one of the things that connect human beings. However, although pain is something that can't be avoided, it doesn't mean that everyone is willing to accept this.
Can The Fear Of Abandonment Cause Someone To Attract People Who Are Emotionally Dependent?
Mon, 10 Dec 2018 09:44:30 -0600
In order for two people to have a relationship together, they will both need to be able to behave like interdependent adults. The reason for this is that if only one of them acts like an interdependent adult, it will stop this from taking place.
Mother Enmeshed Men: Why Do Some Men Go Off Sex When They Are In A Relationship?
Mon, 26 Nov 2018 10:46:27 -0600
Before a man has even got to the point where he is in a relationship with a woman, there is a strong chance that they will already be having sex. If this is not the case, it could show that he is religious.
Why You and Me Doesn't Equal Three
Mon, 10 Sep 2018 12:36:46 -0500
Art therapy class taught me a lot. It consisted of a period of reflective expression in the form of a created piece of art, which was followed by a period of group therapy. It was amazing what took place through sharing what we had drawn, written, painted or sculpted.
Want Control? Then Take Your Responsibility
Mon, 23 Jul 2018 11:49:57 -0500
What I write about below is personal psychology 101. Most people in life want control over their life. Indeed, that's a huge understatement. We all want more control over life and our lives than we can seize. But this want of control, when needing control becomes an idol, creates situations where, most often, we surrender control. Here's how that works.
Relationships: Why Do Some Men Put Up With Bad Behaviour When They Are In A Relationship?
Mon, 12 Nov 2018 11:17:44 -0600
Although some men will have certain standards when they are in a relationship, there are going to be others who don't. As a result of this, not every man is going to have same experience when they are with a woman.
Don't Crush What You Need to Blossom
Wed, 29 Aug 2018 10:31:52 -0500
This is another wise saying of my wife's. 'Don't crush the flower before it gets its chance to blossom.' Now, I am not really a gardener, but I have it on good authority that flowering plants need to be planted and tended well before they can mature. The same theory fits with human beings, whether it is in families, workplaces, churches, or marriages.
Relationships: Do Some Peoples Childhoods Set Them Up To Walk on Eggshells?
Wed, 13 Feb 2019 14:29:32 -0600
When someone can express who they are their life is going to be far more fulfilling than it would be if this wasn't the case. Here, one will be able to listen to themselves and they will be able to allow what is going on within them to come out.
Can Someone End Up With Deeply Wounded People If They Are Out Of Touch With Their Wounds?
Thu, 28 Mar 2019 08:04:54 -0500
If one sees themselves as someone who has got it altogether, or is just in a good place, it can be hard for them to understand why they would end up with someone who is not in a good way. This person is then not just going to have a different personality to them; they won't be as well adjusted.
Do Some People Need To Experience A Few Bad Relationships Before They Can Appreciate A Good One?
Fri, 17 Aug 2018 09:47:36 -0500
There are some people who will feel comfortable being in a relationship with someone who is not abusive, while there will be others who won't. Therefore, if someone who can relate to the former was to end up with someone who is abusive, they would probably soon walk away.
Mother Enmeshed Men: Why Do Some Men Feel Guilty When They Are In A Relationship?
Mon, 26 Nov 2018 10:14:16 -0600
If a man was to end up in an intimate relationship, he may find that he feels fairly comfortable. Perhaps he is with someone who he has a good connection with and is physically attracted to.
Relationships: Why Would Someone Try To Make Their Ex Look Bad?
Mon, 18 Mar 2019 08:27:31 -0500
Once a relationship has come to an end, it could result in two people going their own way. This will then be a clean break, meaning that both of them will be happy to move on with their life.
My Little Dear, It's Not Warm Outside!
Tue, 18 Dec 2018 11:57:19 -0600
Once again, it is the Christmas season, which means I have to put up with people offended by everything, particularly that pertains to Christmas. When I was young, we had a little saying, "Sticks and stones may break your bones but words will never hurt you." And as far as I understand, we stood by that saying. Most people today have never heard that saying and maybe somebody ought to educate them on some of the realities of life. If words are hurting you, something is wrong with "you." Everybody is offended by something. I am offended by people who are offended by things I say, which makes no sense whatsoever to me. Where people got this offend-itis disease is beyond me. I wonder if there is any cure for this kind of disease?
When WE FEEL Taken For Granted
Thu, 29 Nov 2018 11:45:04 -0600
What happens when you have spent the whole day working hard, doing all the household chores and at the end of the day, you feel you deserve a rest. So you prop your feet up, pour yourself a glass of wine and plate yourself some fine cheese, and your spouse walks into the room and says, wow, you are truly enjoying the good life!
Are You Relying On Luck To Get What You Want?
Mon, 01 Oct 2018 12:14:04 -0500
When I used to go to different bars and clubs on a regular basis many, many years ago, there were often men who would talk about how they hoped to 'get lucky'. Sometimes I knew the people who would say this and, at other times, this was something that I would overhear.
Relationships: Why Do Some People Lose Themselves When They Get Into A Relationship?
Mon, 10 Sep 2018 12:33:48 -0500
When two people get together and start a relationship, they can both have their own life. There is going to be how one person likes spend to their life and then there is going to be how the other person likes to spend their life.
Relationships: Why Do Some People Only Feel Good About Themselves When They're In A Relationship?
Wed, 28 Nov 2018 14:10:11 -0600
What one may find is that they are able to feel good themselves, even if they are not in a relationship. It will then be clear that they are not going to be dependent on anyone else in order to experience positive feelings.
Relationships: Do Some People Only Know Who They Are When They Are Being Controlled?
Mon, 19 Nov 2018 11:56:20 -0600
Naturally, someone's life is going to be far more fulfilling if the people in their life are able to respect their boundaries. Having friends, family members and even a partner who can do this is going to make it easier for them to express themselves.
Relationships: Why Are Some Men Attracted To Unavailable Women?
Wed, 27 Mar 2019 10:54:04 -0500
Even though a man may have the desire to be in an intimate relationship with a woman, he may continually end up with women who are not available. Through having been with a number of women who are like this, he may find that this area of his life causes him to experience a fair amount of frustration.
Relationships: What Can Someone Do If They Keep Ending Up With The Wrong Person?
Tue, 18 Dec 2018 10:31:56 -0600
If someone had just bought a car, there is a strong chance that they would have taken it for a test drive first. This would have given them the opportunity to find out what it is like and to see if it would be a good match for them. Along with this, they would have most likely asked a number of questions about the car.
Relationships: Do Some People's Childhoods Set Them Up To Associate Love With Drama?
Mon, 08 Oct 2018 14:50:30 -0500
In the same way that some car journeys can be peaceful and obstacle free and some can be noisy and full of obstacles, relationships can also fall into one of these two categories. What is clear is that it is going to be far healthier for someone to be in a relationship that falls into the fist category than one that falls into the second.
Don't Apologise for Needing to Feel Safe
Mon, 26 Nov 2018 10:51:56 -0600
Just don't do it. There is a reason you need to feel safe. A very good reason. An honourable and right and perfectly sensible reason. So, please don't apologise.
Don't Make Another Person The Centre Of Your World
Mon, 24 Sep 2018 14:18:31 -0500
When I was reading the book, 'Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway', there was a chapter that went into how important it was to have many different areas of interest in life, and not to put all our eggs in one basket, so to speak. The author, Susan Jeffers, pointed out that a lot of people make their partner the centre of their life.
Sexuality: Can Someone's Early Years Have An Effect On What Turns Them On As An Adult?
Mon, 22 Apr 2019 09:49:28 -0500
As an adult, someone can believe that the things that arouse them are just the things that arouse them, and that all there is to it. However, what this wouldn't take into account is the part that their early years may have played in why something in particular has this effect on them.
Relationships: Is It Harder For Someone To Leave An Abusive Relationship If They Feel Worthless?
Wed, 14 Nov 2018 11:41:01 -0600
If someone was to end up in a relationship that is abusive, there are at least two things that they can do. They can end up cutting their ties and moving on, or they can put up with what is taking place.
Relationships: Is It Possible To End Up With The Wrong Person?
Fri, 29 Mar 2019 15:29:12 -0500
Just as one can choose something on a menu and end up finding out that is is not very appealing to their taste buds; they can also end up choosing someone to be in a relationship with, only to find out that they are not a good match. However, although one can just stop eating a meal that doesn't do anything for them, they might not simply be able to walk away from a relationship that is not right.
Dating: Should Someone Be Suspicious If Another Person Acts Extremely Interested In The Beginning?
Thu, 20 Sep 2018 12:09:04 -0500
If someone was to come across a dog, and this dog was to jump up down, making it clear that he/she was pleased to see them, there would be no reason for them to wonder what was going on. This is due to the fact that this just what dogs are like; they don't need a reason to be warm and responsive.
Relationships: Are Some Men Too Emotionally Underdeveloped To Have A Relationship With A Woman?
Thu, 15 Nov 2018 16:34:11 -0600
It is not uncommon for a woman to complain about how she keeps ending up with men who are emotionally unavailable, and it would be easy to say that a woman like this is incredibly unlucky. Time after time, she ends up experiencing the same outcome - it can then seem as though men need to get it together.
Your Worth, My Dear, Is Incalculable
Thu, 31 Jan 2019 12:58:12 -0600
This is a poem for my daughter, really any one of the three of them, and my son, but inspired by that time a daughter doubted her worth. It starts out imagining that first race she won - the X chromosome sperm that beat all the other X and Y chromosome sperm in that infinitesimal race. She is one in ten-million already, as every human being is.
Three Ways to Ease the Prohibitive Conscience
Mon, 15 Oct 2018 09:36:43 -0500
If our key formative relationships featured manipulation, because it was an easy way to control us, we may have developed what can be termed a prohibitive conscience - a conscience based in fear, operating out of guilt. Likewise, if we have encountered people who are controlling, and we haven't been brought up in such a way, such manipulation can be jarring.
Relationships: Should Someone Get Back With Their Ex Back?
Wed, 13 Feb 2019 13:52:48 -0600
For whatever reason, one may have just broken up with their partner, which could mean that they are not in a good way. Perhaps one is experiencing a fair amount of sadness, along with feeling depressed from time to time.
Safe Versus Unsafe Emotions
Mon, 10 Sep 2018 12:36:21 -0500
Emotions belong in two worlds or in two domains. They are either healthy or unhealthy, productive or unproductive, primary or secondary, direct or indirect, safe or unsafe.
Nurture or Neglect?
Mon, 20 Aug 2018 08:39:37 -0500
'I have a lot of room for growth,' I said as a parting shot at church one day. And the mentor I had just conversed with quipped back, 'Yes, well, growth depends on the environment you're planted in, doesn't it?'
Relationships: Why Are Some People Attracted To People Who Are Emotionally Unstable?
Thu, 09 May 2019 08:07:41 -0500
For some people, being in a relationship with someone who is unreliable, unpredictable and who has the need to keep them on edge and in a place of uncertainty is not going to interest them. If they were in this position, it might only be a matter of time before they walk away.
Relationships: Why Do Some People Have The Need To Be Needed'?
Sat, 28 Jul 2018 18:43:14 -0500
While there are people who are not interested in trying to rescue or save other people, there are others who are. As a result of this, some people will be repelled by these kinds of people and some will be drawn to them like bees to a honey pot.
Here's a Person to Be Wary of
Wed, 05 Sep 2018 13:52:29 -0500
The world is full of lovely people, so don't get me wrong if this sounds a bit far-fetched or gets us talking about negative things too much. But the fact is there are people in our lives that gain far too much access to us.
Abuse and the Eggshell Skull Rule
Mon, 15 Oct 2018 09:37:05 -0500
It suddenly occurred to me, having written "a difference between a victim and a survivor", that there is subjectivity out there regarding who can legitimately claim they have been abused. I don't think it's a coincidence that I have just learned about the eggshell skull rule. It's worth knowing about.
When a Relationship Is Not What We Hope
Sat, 21 Jul 2018 10:27:48 -0500
There are times in all our lives when there is a relationship that doesn't quite meet our hopes. There is a particular kind of relationship that continues to elude us with a loved one or a friendship that has experienced fracture.
Responsibility and Control in Relationship
Sat, 21 Jul 2018 10:28:43 -0500
There is one key determinant in gauging mental, emotional, and spiritual health. To what extent does a person have the capability to take their responsibility versus their propensity to control others.
Relationships: Why Do Some People Become Obsessed When They're In A Relationship?
Wed, 07 Nov 2018 09:57:49 -0600
When someone is in a relationship, they may find that their behaviour doesn't really change, and that this allows them to carry on as normal. Clearly, their life will be different as they will be with someone, but this won't have caused them to become someone else.
Relationships: Why Do Some People Focus On Other People's Problems?
Sun, 29 Jul 2018 16:19:40 -0500
Even though one will have their own life to lead while they are on this planet, it doesn't mean that they will actually have their own life. Instead, they could end up spending most of their tine focusing on other people's problems.
Relationships: Can The Fear Of Abandonment Cause Someone Let Anyone Into Their Life?
Thu, 06 Dec 2018 20:40:28 -0600
In the same way that it wouldn't be a good idea for someone to put anything into their mouth; it also wouldn't be a good idea for them to open themselves up to anyone. Therefore, the level of discernment that they show when it comes to the former will need to be shown when it comes to the latter.
Relationships: Why Do Some Men Want A Mother Figure?
Thu, 18 Apr 2019 11:06:58 -0500
Just because a man looks like a man, it doesn't mean that he feels likes like a man on the inside. What is going on externally is then going to have very little to do with what is going on internally.
Are We Attracted To The People Who Will Allow Us To Replay Unresolved Childhood Trauma?
Wed, 24 Oct 2018 14:00:05 -0500
When it comes to what causes one person to be attracted to another, it is can be easy to believe that it is simply due to effect that the other persons personality and/or appearance has had on them. These two factors will then have had the biggest effect on why someone is sexually attracted to another person.
The Power in Naming the Game to Take Its Power Away
Sat, 21 Jul 2018 10:28:05 -0500
One of the healthiest devices known in the field of counselling is the concept of naming what is going on in the room. As I was reminded recently, one way of looking at this is to imagine each phenomenon as the game. There is incredible value in naming a game.
Why Do Some Intellectually Developed People End Up With People Who Are Emotionally Undeveloped?
Wed, 24 Apr 2019 10:35:54 -0500
In a relationship, it is not uncommon for one person to be logical and the other to be emotional. It can then seem as though one person provides what the other is lacking, thereby balancing each other out.
Relationships: Why Do Some Women Always Attract Men Who Are Aloof?
Fri, 17 Aug 2018 10:42:16 -0500
When a woman has the tendency to end up with men who are unavailable, it is naturally going to have a negative effect on her wellbeing. Her desire to be with a man who is available is not going to be met, so it is to be expected that this won't be something that she can simply overlook.
Kindness Is Differential Blindness
Mon, 15 Oct 2018 09:33:54 -0500
If life has taught me anything it is that I am selfish. I'm being honest. I don't see very well at times. But times when I do see well, I'm prone to going my own way. I like to agree with those who think like me, and I tend to judge people who think differently. I am not very kind at times. Indeed, I think it is more the case that kindness is something I've had to work on. It isn't something that comes naturally. I think this is the case for most of us.
Mother Enmeshed Men: Why Do Some Men Only Have Casual Sex?
Mon, 26 Nov 2018 12:25:12 -0600
For some men, casual sex is something that they will engage in from time to time, while there are others who only have casual sex. When it comes to the former, this could be something that takes place after a man has just been in a relationship.
What Does It Take to Become a Christian
Tue, 23 Apr 2019 08:36:43 -0500
This article looks at the steps and mentality a person has who comes to a saving knowledge of Christ. The goal is to discover the way to have a relationship with God that is fulfilling.
Relational Silence That Sabotages or Restores
Mon, 20 Aug 2018 08:44:02 -0500
As a counsellor and a champion for peacemaking, I find there are two noteworthy kinds of silence that occur within conflict. One is very dynamic, but the other is very destructive.
Relationships: Can A Lack Of Emotional Intelligence Cause Someone To Cheat?
Mon, 18 Feb 2019 08:19:42 -0600
There are a number of things that can have a negative effect on a relationship and, while some of these things can be the result of what is taking place within, there can be others that are due to what is taking place without. When it comes to the former, it can be due to inner conflict, with what is taking place between two people causing tension. On the other hand, when it comes to the latter, what is going on externally could be creating tension.
What Was Cute In Romance May Become Acute In Conflict
Thu, 13 Sep 2018 10:10:26 -0500
A number of years ago I read a few books by David Richo, and this is someone who really knows what he is talking about. Whether it is relationships or self-development in general, his books are packed full of insights.
Relationships: Are Some People Addicted To Feeling Rejected?
Mon, 12 Nov 2018 11:08:59 -0600
It could be said that although rejection is part of life, there are some people who experience it more than others. Now, at times this will be due to how someone lives their life.
Betray Someone - What Happens?
Tue, 16 Oct 2018 14:53:41 -0500
To betray an ideal or a loved one can feel deeply disturbing. There are options in how we choose to respond when we are let down by others.
A Front and Rear Guard for the Heart
Mon, 27 Aug 2018 10:31:51 -0500
I awoke as I normally do with the thought, what will I speak on today, and what will I write? Sometimes I already have the idea, but not this day. And then I read Acts chapter 14, and I see two words that summarise what Paul and the brothers were up against on that first missionary journey. First I see the opposition that they faced. The second thing I see is the flattery they encounter. Two completely opposite, and yet equally dangerous spirits, but both replete with opportunity.
The Prodigal Son and His Father
Mon, 19 Nov 2018 13:14:11 -0600
The father in this parable displayed all of his character when his younger son asked for his share of his inheritance before it is due. Reminds me of the scripture "Ask and you shall receive." He never tried to stop his son from taking off.
Christianity: The Only Army Known to Shoot It's Wounded
Tue, 23 Apr 2019 09:12:06 -0500
This article focuses on the relationship between practicing Christians and their followers. It looks at how some Christians respond to the faults in their own members.
Relationships: Can Someone's Split-Off Parts Cause Them To Have Affairs?
Mon, 10 Dec 2018 09:43:52 -0600
There are a number of things that can cause a relationship to come to an end, and some of these things receive more exposure in the public eye than others. For example, it is not uncommon to hear about someone who had an abusive partner and how this caused their relationship to come to an end.
Relationships: How Can A Woman Tell If A Man Is Unavailable?
Fri, 17 Aug 2018 11:21:54 -0500
Although a woman may find that it is relatively easy for her to attract a man, what she may also find is that she is unable to find a man who actually wants a relationship. This may mean that she has been with a number of men who were emotionally unavailable.
Relationships: Is It Harder For Someone To Settle Down If They Have Been With A Lot Of People?
Thu, 27 Sep 2018 16:12:51 -0500
In the past, it was the norm for people to wait until they were married before they had sex, and they would have most likely stayed with the same person until their time on this earth came to an end. Thanks, in part, due to the 'sexual liberation' of the 60s and 80s, this has all changed.
Intimacy: Can Someone Be Unaware Of Their Own Fear Of Intimacy?
Thu, 18 Oct 2018 15:03:41 -0500
If someone has the desire to be in an intimate relationship, they may find that it is only a matter of time before they meet the right person. Alternatively, they may find that they are only able to get so far.
The Dynamics of Love and Control in Relationships
Sat, 28 Jul 2018 18:44:13 -0500
For some, in some situations, love is neither the desire nor do we have its agency. Love's not so easy. Situations like these we feel controlled or we act out of a need to have control. Relationship in this way is about taking and demanding and not giving or letting go. No matter what we try to do, the person we want to love will not receive that love. Whatever we give doesn't seem to be enough or even the right thing; it isn't perceived as loving.
Delighting In Dealing With Difficult People
Mon, 15 Oct 2018 09:36:33 -0500
You sense it straight away, booking an appointment over the phone. The person on the other end is efficient if not a little curt. With every second it seems there is a heightening urgency in their voice. You feel as if you're being intentionally problematic for them, even though you're diligently polite.
Let Them Drown
Tue, 07 May 2019 12:13:08 -0500
When is helping hurting? Is it okay to let them drown?
Relationships: Do Some Women's Childhoods Set Them Up To Surrender To The Wrong Men?
Thu, 21 Feb 2019 08:29:50 -0600
There are women in the world who will be only too happy to surrender to a man, while there are women out there who won't. As a result of this, these women are going to have radically different expectations.
Can 'iron Sharpens Iron' Become an Excuse for Abuse?
Wed, 29 Aug 2018 10:33:28 -0500
Another goblet of gold from my wife, here. The conversation went this way: Me: you say that 'encouragement is sometimes about finding the right time for iron to sharpen iron.' Does that mean we just need to wait for the right time to give someone a truth they may not like to hear? Wife: I think it's more complicated than that. There's more to be considered. Iron sharpening iron, as a method of encouragement, must be a tremendously complex idea. There's a stand-alone article in that. Me: okay. That sounds exciting.
What Did Your Parents Teach You About Men And Women?
Thu, 06 Sep 2018 09:29:20 -0500
I remember reading 'Family Secrets' by John Bradshaw and in this book he said, "it was and is your parents' actually lives that educated you: not what they said, but what they did". I took this to mean that what my parents did was far more important than what came out of their mouth.
Relationships: Is There A Difference Between Helping Someone And Trying To Rescue Them?
Tue, 06 Nov 2018 14:11:22 -0600
If one was to find out that a friend or a family member is going through a tough time, there are a number of things that they could do. They could end up calling them up, or they could go and see them.
My Irregular Relationship With Compassion Fatigue
Mon, 20 Aug 2018 08:43:49 -0500
I must say, that what still comes very much without warning, I still find hard to deal with, but I know in being honest I can trust my method. I have an irregular relationship with compassion fatigue, in that I feel I am sucked dry of empathy at times to the point where I have nothing left. Times like this I'm irrational in what I say, I complain, and I can't quite seem to find space and outlet for recovery. It is generally the night's sleep that brings me out of it.
Relationships: Can The Fear Of Being Seen Cause Someone To Attract People Who Are Unavailable?
Fri, 17 Aug 2018 11:04:56 -0500
There are a number of things that can stop one from being able to have a fulfilling relationship, and ending up with someone who is unavailable will be one of the things that will stop them from being able to fulfil this need. When this takes place, they can find it hard to understand how this has happened.
How the Best Advice I Ever Got Hurt Before Its Truth Hit Home
Sat, 28 Jul 2018 18:44:42 -0500
It seemed so simple, but I was gobsmacked by the profoundness of what was said. There, as I lay there, my wife scooped in my arms, in bed to sleep, I was wide awake with awe, at the advice I had five minutes earlier heard my wife utter to me.
Relationships: Can Shame Stop Someone From Reaching Out To Others?
Mon, 03 Dec 2018 10:47:37 -0600
What can't be denied is that no one is their own island; human beings need each other. This is why it has been said that although some people say that they are independent, this is nothing more than an illusion.
Relationships: Can Someone Be Emotionally Unavailable Even Though They're In A Relationship?
Wed, 10 Apr 2019 12:26:09 -0500
It would be easy to believe that the people who are emotionally unavailable are single and the ones who aren't are in a relationship. Or, if someone is emotionally available and single, it could just show that they are taking a break after going through a breakup, for instance.
You CAN Learn To Make Yourself Feel Safe
Mon, 16 Jul 2018 21:22:31 -0500
Growing up, many of us didn't feel at all safe in our households. Many of us had parents or other caregivers who were physically, emotionally, and/or sexually abusive or neglectful. We had to find ways to manage this lack of safety, so we learned to numb out, eat or use other substances, be good, be bad or try to be perfect, or project the fear on something other than our parents, because acknowledging that it was our parents causing our fear caused more fear.